Today we have more tips and advice for our pet series, How to Help Your Pets Deal with Life Change.
Having a pet for many people is like having another family member. We love our pets because they’re loving, sensitive, and often quite emotional. But for those same reasons, change can be very difficult for them.
But unlike human family members, pets don’t have the verbal capabilities for you to explain to them what is going on. So it’s important that you help your furry family member transition in a way that makes sense to him or her.
You can learn tips for helping your pets deal with some of the most common changes that occur over a lifetime. These can help you ease the pain of transition for both you and your pets, whatever kind of pet or pets you have.
One of the most common changes in a pet’s life is “the new baby”. It is very important for your pet’s emotional well-being for you to know beforehand How to Help Your Pets Deal with Life Change. You do not want to get into a situation and think to yourself, “Why didn’t I think of that before”.
1. Bringing Home the New Baby
When you’re preparing to have a new baby, a lot can happen for your pet. First, during pregnancy, there can be a major shift in energy throughout the entire household.
a. Family Excitement
The entire family may be feeling excited, nervous, and even a little fearful. Your pet will definitely pick up on that energy. And when you bring baby home, you’ll be adding a new person to the household that becomes the center of attention.
b. New Smells and Noises
This new baby smells different, makes funny noises, and is completely helpless. It’s important that you try to stay calm during this transition period, though that can be admittedly difficult to do.
Be consistent with your pets and keep boundaries and limitations the same throughout pregnancy and bringing baby home. You also need to establish a boundary between your pets and your baby’s room.
Make sure that you do this before you even bring the baby home. Teach your pets that the baby’s room is off-limits. That said, you do want your pets to get used to the scent of your new baby.
One way you can do this is to bring items the baby has worn home before the baby comes home from the hospital. Let the pets sniff the items and check them out to get used to the smell.
c. Introducing The New Baby
When it’s time to introduce new baby to the pet, it helps if your pet has been drained of excess energy and excitement. Generally, this is for dogs but some young cats may need help in this area. Give your pooch a long walk before you bring the baby inside so that it’s likely to be calmer.
Before allowing the dog back into the house, make sure that it’s calm. Then hold your baby in a very calm way and allow your dog to sniff without getting too close.
By keeping the baby at a distance, you’re establishing boundaries. Make sure that you never leave your baby unattended with your pets – even the best pets may inadvertently harm a very small infant.
Dogs are usually very excited but cats can try to sleep with the baby and cause issues.
d. Keeping the Pets Included
At the same time, make sure to give your pets a lot of care including daily walking and keeping boundaries and routines. You do not want your pet to feel that it has been replaced or is no longer important.
There is no need to go overboard and heap toys, treats, and attention on your pets, this kind of changes can actually make your pet more excited and nervous.
e. Train Children to Respect Pets
This is one of the most overlooked pieces in a happy home puzzle. Pets are expected to behave but children are often not trained on how to properly treat pets.
As your child gets older, it will want to explore and it’s important that you begin training your child from an early age to be respectful of the pets. Many situations can or could have been avoided if the children were as well trained and well-behaved as the pets. Teach children not to pull on dogs or disturb the cat while it is sleeping or eating. Always supervise your children with your pets. When your children are taught to be careful and respectful of animals in general, it goes a long way toward them learning to be respectful of others later on. As long as everyone respects each other life is easier all the way around.
Another situation in which you should know How to Help Your Pets Deal with Life Change is bringing home a new pet.
2. Introducing a New Furry Friend
When you’re ready to add a new pet to your household, it can be a very exciting thing for your family. But your other pets may or may not be as excited as you are to have a new housemate.
a. A New Dog
If you’re bringing home a new dog, you don’t want to just toss two dogs into the same room and hope they like each other. There are some things you can do to make introductions go more smoothly.
For example, make sure that you introduce your dogs to each other in neutral territory. Going on a walk together around the block or even at a local park will work well.
Make sure that you have a person to handle each dog on a leash. Make sure that you are calm to begin with and don’t put a lot of tension on the leash – you want both dogs to feel relaxed and calm.
And don’t force the dogs to interact but instead let them go at their own pace. Dogs will naturally want to sniff each other to get acquainted. Watch both dogs to look for distress.
Both dogs should be relaxed and have open mouths. If one or both dogs get stiff, growl, or bare their teeth you’re likely to have aggression. At that point, separate the dogs and take a break before reintroducing.
Once you feel that the two dogs are relaxed and tolerant of each other or are even friendly with each other, you can take them home together. At home, you can ease the transition by making sure that each dog has his own food bowl, water bowl, and toys.
You’ll also want to keep the dogs separated (crate training works very well) when you’re not home to supervise them. Be very patient because it can take dogs a few weeks to really settle in and feel at home.
b. Introducing a New Cat
When introducing a new cat, you’ll have a different set of considerations. Cats, in particular, can become very stressed when entering a new home. Work with your dog before you bring a cat home on obedience and being calm.
If your dog is calm when the cat comes home, the cat will have less stress and will be less likely to have problems with the dog. When you bring the cat home, place him in a separate room with food, water, and a litter box.
Your dog and cat can become more familiar with each other’s scents through the door. Then you can begin to introduce them in the same room keeping your dog on a leash.
Provide your dog and cat with their favorite treats when you introduce them, and keep the introduction brief. Eventually, you can leave the door open and let your cat roam.
Cats are very good at hiding when they feel threatened. Don’t force your new cat to come out – give him time to get used to the surroundings. And continue to work with your dog on leaving the cat alone so that it can feel safe.
When you’re not home, keep your dog and cat separated until you’re sure that the two are comfortable with each other. Eventually, your cat and dog may become the best of friends, but at the very least they’ll learn to tolerate each other.
c. Introducing Two Cats
It is best to follow similar steps when introducing two cats rather than a dog and a cat.
Give everyone time to get used to the other cats’ smell before you give them a face-to-face.
Keep the new cat in a different room with all its’ own stuff. This way the old cat does not feel that the new cat is taking its’ place or stealing its’ stuff. Yes, that is a thing with pets, just like with kids.
Gradually introduce the two cats and give them some space to get to know each other.
Cats will usually just ignore each other for a long time before they become friends.
It is possible that your cats will not be friends, but hopefully, they will just keep to themselves and to their respective spaces.
It is unusual but not unheard of for cats to have nasty fights before they get their pecking order worked out. In this case, do not get between them. Try to break them up from a distance, water usually will do it. When the cats run in different directions, carefully take the new cat back to its separate place. Once everyone has settled down you can try introducing them again but it may be best to wait a day or two.
These days it seems like moving jobs, homes, and states is about as common as breathing. Very few people will be born, raised, live, and die in their family home. If you are lucky enough to have a “Home Place”, appreciate and enjoy it. In older times, that was the common thing but nowadays, it is not. So you should know How to Help Your Pets Deal with Life Change when moving to a new home.
3. Adjusting to a Move
A. Home Moving
Moving is stressful for even the most organized families and that stressful energy can be passed on to your pets.
Your dog is most concerned about being with you wherever you are. But your energy and stress can rub off on them. It can also be stressful for a pet to have a big change in routine and to travel for a long period of time.
There are a few things you can do, though, to ease this transition.
First, try to keep your pet’s schedule as regular as possible. That means feeding, playing, and exercising at the same times as you would have at home.
Taking that extra time out can make a big difference for pets. Also, if you have a bed or crate that your pets really love continue to provide that comfort for them. Your pets may feel much more relaxed having their own beds in the back of the car or even traveling in their usual crates.
When you get to your new place, establish the areas where your pet will sleep and eat. Make sure there are some familiar toys and treats to help your pets settle in. By using the things you had at the previous home, your pets will settle in more quickly.
As much as possible, watch your own energy levels. Your pets will be less stressed if you stay calm. It is pretty normal for a pet to skip a meal or two during the process of traveling and moving.
But once you get settled for a few days, most pets are able to handle the changes. They’re happy as long as you make the move with them.
B. Military Deployment
Along with Adjusting to a move, think of how your pet will adjust to military deployment. If you are in the military, have a plan for your pets. Ask yourself if I deploy where will my pets go? Could I take them with me or will I need to find them a new place? Will my deployment be short as in a few months, in which case I could board my pets or have a family member keep them for me? Or will this be a long-term deployment where it would be best to rehome my pets? Have all of your pets’ medical records and history up to date and on hand. Map out a plan for both long-term and short-term deployment, this way there will be less stress on you and your pets when the time comes.
The best arrangement would be for a trusted friend or family member who your pets already know to take care of them while you are gone. But if that is not possible, be sure you have a safety plan already set up to provide the best situation for your pets while you are deployed.
Sadly, many pets are abandoned at the animal control when a soldier is deployed or moves stations. With a little planning ahead, this can be avoided, in most cases.
Another situation in which you should know How to Help Your Pets Deal with Life Change is an illness in the family.
4. When a Family Member Becomes Seriously Ill
a. A Human Family Member
When one of your family members becomes ill, it can have a big impact on the family pets. Pets are very emotional and can sense illness in their owners. It is important that you do not ignore your pet during this time as it can create behavior problems later.
First of all, if at all possible keep your routine, boundaries, and rules the same as if everyone were healthy. Pets need this type of structure in order to feel safe and trust their owners.
When you take away the order, pets can become anxious and afraid. It’s not uncommon for pets to sense weakness in their owners when they become ill and want to protect them.
While it may seem sweet for a dog to be protective, it can also be very dangerous. A dog on a leash that’s protective can become aggressive and actually pull his owner too hard, causing injury.
Dogs that are protective can also become aggressive toward other people and animals and try to keep them away from their owners. There are many cases of typically non-aggressive dogs becoming aggressive when their owner is ill and weak.
Even if you’re ill, you can still be a strong leader for your dog. If you’re not well enough to exercise your dog daily, try to get some help from a friend or family member to help your dog get daily exercise.
Whatever rules and boundaries were established when you were well should be kept in force during times of extended illness. Don’t reinforce negative behaviors by using a calm and soothing voice.
Instead, be firm and strict and save the nice voice for when your dog is calm and doing the right thing. The main thing to remember is that you want your dog to feel secure.
Dogs like to be led by their owners and need to know the rules and boundaries so that they can feel safe.
Although cats are less open with their feelings, they can and do have the same issues and reactions to sick loved ones as dogs do.
A cat will become just as unsettled and tense as people or dogs when there is an illness in the house. They can feel the difference in the family and it will make them upset as well.
Again, try to keep the routine of the house the same as always. Keep the cats’ schedule the same and try to stay calm around the cat.
When cats are upset they can become aggressive or afraid. Cats can also become protective of an owner, though not as often as dogs.
So, if your cat seems upset or changes its behavior or attitude try to reassure it that things are normal. You may need to spend more time doing the normal things you do with your cat to help with this. If your cat likes to be brushed, take a few extra minutes to brush it or brush the cat more than once a day to comfort it.
b. Another Pet Family Member
Many people do not consider one pet’s emotional attachment to another pet. But when one pet is sick, injured, or dies the other pets can be just as upset and affected as you are. Pets do become very bonded to their people but they also bond to the other pets in the family and the loss of one pet can be very hard on other pets.
When there is a sick pet in the home be sure to take time with that pet but do not forget to give comfort to the other pets as well. Take a little extra time to sit with your pets. Talk to them as you normally would, and keep your routines as regular as possible. Keeping this the same as always will help to assure the pets that all is well. They will know something is off but as long as you keep calm, and keep your emotions level, the pets will pick up on this and respond accordingly. Pets will often mimic their owner’s feelings, attitudes, and reactions. This is your pets taking their cues from you but also their show of support. Remember this when you have issues in your life, your pets will feel it from you.
This goes for both the illness of a pet and the death of another pet. To your pets, these situations feel the same and they may act out in a similar fashion. Be sure you are there to comfort your pets in times like these. You will find in giving comfort to your pets, you will get comforted in return.
The biggest situation in which you should know How to Help Your Pets Deal with Life Change is with a death in the family. Death of a family member can be hard on people but it can equally affect family pets.
5. Mourning a Human Loss
a. Planning Ahead for Your Pets
When a family member dies, it’s obvious that everyone will feel grief. And that applies to pets as well. Animals can form intense bonds with their owners and feel devastated and sad when they go.
As a pet owner, it is important that you plan ahead for what will happen if you can no longer take care of your pet. Who will become your pet’s new owner? Where will they go?
Planning ahead can make a smooth transition if the unthinkable happens. Having paperwork as part of your will that is specific about the pets can be very helpful. Just make sure that you get the possible future guardian of your pets to agree to take on this responsibility.
You can also prepare a future guardian by keeping important information prepared about your pets such as:
* Veterinarians’ name and contact information
* Shot/health records, medical records
* Daily routine – times for waking, feeding, walking, etc.
* Brand of food
* Contact information for grooming and typical schedule of services
* Location of preferred boarding facility
* Preferred treats and toys
b. Planning for Taking in Another Person’s Pets
If you’re the one left behind when someone dies and are taking care of the pets, it is important that you provide support for these furry friends. Taking care of someone’s beloved pet can be a great way to honor them after they pass.
Of course, it helps a lot for the pets to already be familiar with you before the person passes. If you are family or a close friend who is in and out of the person’s home all the time, the pets will already be comfortable with you. Already being friends with the person’s pets will go a long way to ease the grief and transition period.
1. Keep to Their Routine
Again pets will pick up on the energy of the household and certainly will be aware of grief and stress. At the same time, they can continue to feel safe if they are able to stick to a normal routine.
If you know the pet’s routine do your best to stick to it and make transitions slowly if those times don’t work for you. For example, if the pet normally wakes up at 6:00 A.M. to go outside, but you prefer sleeping later, start by moving it to 6:15 A.M. for a week. Then you can go to 6:30 A.M. Continue in this manner until you’ve developed your preferred schedule.
2. Take the Pets Stuff Home With You
If you end up having to take a new pet or pets home with you, try to keep things as easy as possible for the new pets. Take their stuff with them so they have familiar things around them. Their beds, blankets, and toys should go with them. Having their old stuff in a new home may help ease them into the change.
It may be helpful to take an item that belonged to their owner, especially if they were closely bonded. Try a blanket or piece of clothing that the owner used often so it still has the smell of it. This may help the pets feel more comfortable in a new home. Yes, the smell will fade but it will still retain some of the owner’s smell for a while. Eventually the pets, hopefully, will become accustomed to their new home and become bonded to their new family.
It is best to keep pets on the same food as their owner had been feeding them. You can transition the pets onto a new food, slowly by mixing the old food with the new food a bit at a time. You do not want to change foods on a pet all at once. Possibly the pets will not like the new food, or just the change but a quick change in food can also cause stomach upset and possible illness.
3. Visit the Pets Regular Vet
It is also a good idea to visit a veterinarian to make sure the pet is physically healthy and ask any questions that you may have. If you can take the pets to their usual vet, the vet and staff may be able to give you tips to help you with your new pets.
Taking care of a loved one’s pet can be a great privilege and the loving companionship can also help ease some of your own grief. There is something to two people who both loved someone to give each other comfort after that person is gone. The same goes for people and pets. Taking your family member’s pet or pets into your family can give both you and the pet’s comfort. It can make you feel closer to the person by caring for their pets.
As we have said in all the other talks in this pet series, How to Help Your Pets Deal with Life Change is not a complete list of everything for every situation. This is just a place to start and things to give you to think about. It is always best to think ahead and be as prepared as you can for future situations.
Of course, every pet and every situation are different so you will need to be flexible to handle things as they come up. But at least having an idea of what to do or where to start is one step in the right direction.
And again, we are not vets or lawyers, this talk is for information and ideas only. If you have a situation, consult a vet or lawyer for further info. If you would like, feel free to visit our disclaimer page.
We hope you have enjoyed this talk about How to Help Your Pets Deal with Life Change. For your pet’s sake and your peace of mind, please consider some of this advice.
In case you missed any of our other talks in this pet series, you can catch them below.
You Are Thinking of Getting a Pet?
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